Last week we held the first BabyHole Sausagefest Contest and no one won, even though it's the easiest contest to win. All you have to do is sign up for the open mic with a real vagina. If you have a fake vagina, can I please borrow it? I need it for a project.
The prize for the last BabyHole Sausagefest Contest was a bottle of my favorite champagne, Andre. Since no one won, I had to drink it all by myself!
That prize was consumed. The prize for the next BabyHole Sausagefest Contest is a pack of nudie playing cards from Atlantic City. All the guys in it look like they reached their peak in 1986 or earlier in Eastern Europe.
Maybe I'll have a bottle of Andre on hand anyway.