Saturday, August 21, 2010

The most retarded couple I've ever served

This morning a couple walked into the high-end liquor store I work at.

Man: Yo, do you have Ace of Spades? The Jay-Z liquor.
Me: We have Ace of Spades champagne on the top shelf.
Man: It's Jay-Z's liquor right?
Me: I don't know if Jay-Z's the spokesman..
Woman: How much is it?
Me: $250 on sale. The rose is $450.
Man: Which one's better?
Me: The rose.
Woman: Can we taste it?
Me: No.
Woman: Why not?
Man: (pointing at Dirty Dog) What kind of dog is that?
Me: A mutt.
Man: Oh, there's a breed called Mutt?
Me: No.
Man: Because to us a mutt is a stray dog.
Me: Well, yeah.

Then they became inexplicably offended and stormed out. The worst part is they had a baby. I wish I could see its face to gauge how far apart its eyes were.


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Wow I'm crying for the poor child.

Anonymous said...

Maybe they will eat the baby, and it won't have to grow up with the shame of having them as parents.

Anonymous said...

Do you and your pets have tear tattoos because you killed people in prison? That would be hot.

Grace said...

Melissa what did you think of the Oktoberfest? Inquiring minds want to know